Safe Driving Award

A highway patrolman pulled over a driver and told him that because he was wearing his seat belt, he had just won $5000 in a safety competition.

"What are you going to do with the money?" the officer asked.

"I guess I’ll go to driving school and get my license," the man answered.

"Don’t listen to him" said the woman in the passenger seat. "He’s a smart aleck when he’s drunk."

This woke up the guy in the back seat, who saw the cop and said, "I knew we wouldn’t get far in a stolen car."

Then there was a knock from the trunk and a voice asked, "Are we across the border yet?"